Monday Morning Mojo

Monday Mojo: Life is a jar of marbles

By Tom Tognoli | January 2nd, 2012 0 Comments

Happy New Year!!!!!!

Wow…where did 2011 go? Don’t the years just seem to fly by? I don’t know about you, but and the older you get the faster they seem to go. Kind of like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end the faster it goes…right? J

As we put another year in the book of years past and start a fresh one, let’s take a minute and really think about our life and what is most important.

Take two jars:

Fill one with 80 marbles and put a label on the jar that says “Years Left.”
Take the second jar that is empty and put a label on it that says “Years Past.”

Now take the number of marbles out of the “Years Left” jar that equals your age and put those in the “Years Past” jar. For example, I transferred 47 marbles (my age) from the “Years Left” jar to the “Years Past” jar. Now, if you are over 80, start moving the marbles back each year. Those are bonus years.

Even if you don’t physically do the exercise, take a few minutes right now to close your eyes and visualize the marbles in each of the jars. How many are there in each?

So frequently we think we have forever to accomplish the important things in life. This exercise will really open your eyes and is a great thing to keep in front of you every day. It will remind you not to take today for granted. It will slap you right in the face every day and get you into action regarding your F5 – Faith, Family, Friends, Fitness and Finance. It will pull your head right out of the proverbial sand very quickly.

How can we make the marbles in the “Years Left” magical and how can we add extra marbles to the “Years Past” jar? It is actually not that complicated but incredibly difficult for most people to do. Spend time every day focused on making a slight improvement in all the areas of your F-5. Because if you are not improving in those areas a little bit everyday you are slipping back a little bit in each of those areas every day. We never stay the same.

You can do this exercise with many different aspects of your life. For example if you have kids, put 18 marbles in a “Years Left” jar when they are born and then each year take one marble out and put it in the “Years Past” jar. That will get you to go play catch with your kids and not take them for granted.

Yes, we can always say I will do it tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year. The question we have to ask ourselves is how many marbles do we have left and should we wait or quit procrastinating and just do it.

Don’t wait…Just do it!!!!!!!!!!

Monday Mojo: Top five Mojos of 2011

By Tom Tognoli | December 26th, 2011 0 Comments

As we say goodbye to 2011 and look forward to the awesome possibilities of 2012, let’s not forget that sometimes what motivates and inspires us are the everyday acts and simple things that anyone can do to make this world and ourselves better. With this in mind we compiled a list of the most popular and inspirational Mojo’s of 2011.

The tiny black dot
If you’ve been staring at some tiny black dots recently, take responsibility for that. And recognize that nobody is forcing you to keep your eyes on the black dot. You have a choice. You can keep staring at the black dot and telling others about all the things that are wrong in your life, or you can begin to appreciate your many blessings. Sounds like a pretty easy choice to make, doesn’t it?
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Be 110% committed
Most people just want to dip their toes in the water with things in life when what we really need to do is dive in! You see it every day – people showing up but not going full out. It will be the difference between winning and losing. The good thing is most people go through life only playing half speed. So if you go 110% you will not only score, but you will CRUSH IT and win!!
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Success has to be an obsession
Success…how bad do you really want it? So many of us say we want to be successful, but we really don’t want it bad enough and that is why we don’t have it. You have to want it so bad that you are willing to do whatever it takes to get it. Because until you get to the point where all you want to do is be successful and nothing else matters, success will elude you. It has to be an obsession.
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My life is in a rut
In life we can’t live between the ruts, it’s just too hard, it’s like trying to balance on a tight rope for our entire life – eventually we get tired and fall to one side. Let’s make the commitment today to scrape and claw our way out of the bad ruts. Once we’re out, just roll over and fall into the good rut. There will be short-term pain with getting out, but it will pass and then you will experience the long-term gain of living life in the good ruts.
Read More
Challenge + Crisis + Pain = Opportunity
Why does life throw challenges and crisis at us, like the crisis we have all been dealing with for the last year? In every crisis and in every challenge there is an opportunity. We just have to find it. Remember, life is about who we become and how we grow when faced with challenge, with crisis, and with pain. It is what life is all about. It is why we are here. So step back and look in the mirror, who are you becoming?
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2012 is going to be a great year!

Morning Mojo: Merry Christmas

By Tom Tognoli | December 19th, 2011 0 Comments

Can you believe it? Christmas is only six days away.

I would like to wish all of you a Merry Christmas and thank you for the wonderful gift. Thank you for the gift of opportunity to share Monday Morning MOJO with you.

By having to think, research and create ideas to share every week it has forced me to reaffirm what is important to me in my life. By writing Monday Morning MOJO I have also attracted into my life more of the things which are important to my family, my friends, our company and me.

As we have discussed in past Monday Morning MOJO’s, one of the best ways to get more of what you want in life is to help others get more of what they want. I hope I have been able to help you do just that – you have certainly helped me. You have been my best accountability partner in 2011.

So, don’t forget to get more of what you want next year – help others get more of what they want. You have to give to get!

So, what do you want Monday Morning MOJO to provide you for Christmas?

I have been sending out Monday Morning MOJO now for nearly a decade and I thought I would ask you what you are struggling with in life, what breakthroughs are you wanting to accomplish but just can’t quite seem to make it happen? What questions do you want Monday Morning MOJO to help with? Do you have an inspirational story to share – one that you think can make a difference for the thousands of people who receive Monday Morning MOJO? It’s the stories of real experiences that truly make the difference and have the largest impact.

My gift to you today for Christmas is MOJO. What exactly is MOJO you ask?

MOJO defined is:

A magic charm or spell
The art or practice of casting magic spells
An object, as an amulet or charm that is believed to carry a magic spell
MOJO is me sending you success, health, and happiness.

Merry Christmas!!!!!!!

Morning Mojo: Get it!!!!!!

By Tom Tognoli | December 12th, 2011 0 Comments

The hustle and bustle of the holiday season. I don’t know about you, but this time of year with so many things to do I sometimes feel like I am one step behind and can’t keep up…holiday parties, Christmas shopping, packed malls, yearend projects, etc. I can become impatient. Remember as we go through the holiday season what it is all about. Also remember sometimes things and people are not as they appear. Check it out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TINwByhK2v4&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Happy Holidays.

Morning Mojo: 21 Gun Salute

By Tom Tognoli | December 5th, 2011 0 Comments

People measure success by the money they make, houses they own, cars they drive, toys they have, or title on their business card. The true measure of success is none of that stuff. The true definition of success in life is how much you have loved and been loved.

He was a great leader, father, and friend to many. With hundreds of people in the room he was honored with tears, smiles and laughter. One of his best friends, Roger Malech, gave him what he called his 21 gun salute at the memorial. He shared with us the 21 most important things he taught him. Based on the number of people in attendance at his memorial I think he taught them to us all. This past week we honored the life of one of Intero’s original Founders, Kevin Moles…a man who defined success. Kevin unexpectedly passed away at the age of 55 a few weeks ago, this is his 21 gun salute.

1. Cowboy boots go with anything – even a Tuxedo.

2. It’s okay for a man to smell good, I mean really good. No man smelled as good as Kevin. I remember more than once my wife would come home and I would say, “Why do you smell like men’s cologne?” and she would say “I saw Kevin today and he gave me a hug”

3. There’s no situation so bad that a little Beach Boys won’t help.

4. A party is not a real party unless Hank shows up. And we all know he was talking about Hank Williams Jr.

5. It is possible to pass another car on a freeway on-ramp. I learned this first hand because I was with him when he passed Kristi Pritchard on the Leavesly on-ramp.

6. The top speed on 101 between the Dunne and Cochrane exits is 130 MPH.

7. It’s completely acceptable to take 2 hours off in the middle of the work day and see a movie, even if it’s just the movie “Joe Dirt” and it’s playing in Kevin’s family room.

8. The best way to solve a problem is to start by putting your feet on your desk.

9. The worst day selling real estate is better than the best day picking strawberries. Kevin had this fantasy of loading up all the agents on a bus for a mystery play day. He wanted to take them all to a strawberry farm on a summer day and have them pick strawberries for 4 hours. He was convinced that this was the way to stop the whining about how difficult selling real estate was. We never did that but I can’t pass a strawberry farm to this day without being thankful that I am in the business I am.

10. In the term “Independent Contractor”, the word “Independent” is greatest, by far.

11. You never know what the tide will bring in. This is from the movie “Castaway” and it references when Tom Hanks is hopeless and can’t get off the island but is looking out to sea and notices a piece of an old port-a-potty floating in the surf. He eventually uses it as a sail to get off the island. When Kevin would tell me “You never know what the tide will bring in”, he was offering hope. It was his way of saying keep going. Keep looking to the surf. Don’t give up. Life may give you a port-a-potty but you can use it to sail to freedom. Kevin really believed that.

12. The most important recruiting technique is to keep the people you have happy.

13. The second most important recruiting technique is to be attractive to other agents.

14. If you treat a group of people with respect and love, give them what they need, and then leave them alone, they will follow you anywhere. This was proven 9 years ago when 42 of us left the company we worked for and joined the first Intero office here in Morgan Hill. We didn’t know what Intero meant, we didn’t know what to expect, and we didn’t even know what our commission splits were going to be. None of that mattered because we wanted to be with Kevin. Last week I was talking to Ira Marshall, a financial planner that Kevin used. He told me that every time he met with Kevin, Kevin would share concerns about the agents. He would talk about them by name and asked Ira if he could meet with them and help them. Ira told me “Kevin had a love affair with his agents. He really did care about them. It wasn’t just about business.”

15. If the term “generous to a fault” were true, Kevin was the faultiest man I’ve ever known.

16. Real men can kiss and hug each other.

17. Real men can say “I love you” to each other. Often times, including the last time I saw him, Kevin would ask me “Who loves you baby?” I would say “Ummm you?”

18. Real men admit their mistakes. One day, after his divorce, Kevin and I were having a heart to heart and he said “I really screwed up Rog. Tesha is the best woman I’ll ever know.”

19. Yesterday is a cancelled check. Tomorrow is a promissory note. Today is legal tender, spend it wisely.

20. God can use us, however flawed we might be, to have an incredible impact on others. I am not the same man I was as before I met Kevin. He was a friend, a brother, and a mentor. He will not be forgotten because I feel like I owe him a debt that can never be re-paid. He was instrumental in helping me get sober 15 years ago and I dedicate the rest of my days of sobriety to him.

21. You can’t outrun God. Kevin wrestled with God his entire life and we had many discussions about spiritual things. The last time I saw him it was very evident that his wrestling was over. He had made peace with God and told me He had committed his life to Jesus and had been baptized. That doesn’t mean his troubles were over but it does mean that I will see him again. I look so forward to that and I can’t wait until we can both share a glass of wine (without the burden of addiction) with Jesus and I will hear those familiar words “Who loves you, baby?”

We love you Kevin and we will see you in Heaven.

Morning Mojo: Get Comfortable with Change

By Tom Tognoli | November 28th, 2011 0 Comments

Does any of this sound familiar?

“…sounds like a great idea, I will get started tomorrow.” Yeah right…like that is really going to happen…just like the last thousand times he said “I will start tomorrow.”

“Wow, I can see how that will have a hugely positive impact on my life, but I just don’t have time to deal with making the necessary changes right now…I will try and implement that next month when things settle down.” We all know things never “settle down.”

“Why is it that no matter what I seem to do…not matter how much I work or how hard I try, I can never get ahead in my F5 (Faith, Family, Friends Fitness, Finance)? I am trying hard every day, but there just aren’t enough hours in the day.”

Here is the first thing we all need to get real clear on…no matter how hard we try, if we continue to do what we have always done, we will continue to get what we have always gotten. So, to get more of what we want in our lives, the key is not doing more of what we are currently doing harder, but doing different…changing the way we look at things….the way we do things. Sounds easy…right? NOT!!!!

Getting comfortable with change does not happen overnight…it is something we need to train ourselves to get comfortable with. Most of the things we do in our life and our thoughts are a routine that have been engrained in us over YEARS. So, we plow on, mindlessly doing the same old things in the same old way. Whether these routines or thoughts are good or bad, like a drop of water which continuously hits on a rock, our habits create a hole or a rut. And the longer the drop of our habits hit the rock, the deeper the hole. Over time as that hole gets deeper and deeper, the harder it is to get out of the rut when we want to make a change.

So, why haven’t we forced ourselves out of the rut before now? Most of the time we don’t change because we are afraid…it makes us uncomfortable…makes us feel exposed…or we are just plain lazy. And the older we get the harder it is to make changes because we tend to become less and less flexible. And because we have been doing things one way for such a long time, the hole in the rock becomes the size of the Grand Canyon. So, the key is to train ourselves to get comfortable with change…someone who actually embraces change…someone who actually gets a rush from being innovative and doing it different.

Start challenging your routines. Stop running into the brick wall. Pause…Think. Find a new way that goes around the wall, or maybe over it. Rest assured, the new way is there. It does exist. Changing your habits can itself become common place. The first time you defy “your way” and climb out of your rut it nearly kills you…the second time, it’s real tough…the third time, it’s merely hard. And eventually, it becomes, if not easy, then reasonably comfortable. Your confidence grows, and the tyrant loses a large part of its hold on you. Then, the magic of having a life that is unbelievable pure magic starts to unfold!!!

Make it a powerful week!!!!!

Morning Mojo: Challenge + Crisis + Pain = OPPORTUNITY

By Tom Tognoli | November 21st, 2011 0 Comments

Why does life throw challenges and crisis at us, like the crisis we have all been dealing with for the last year?

Because that is the only way we will change. It is the only way we will rid ourselves of evil, bad habits, greed, ego and the wrong priorities. It’s human nature wanting to stay the course, not to rock the boat, and usually the only way we will change is if we are forced into it by some outside influence, i.e. financial crisis, death, illness, catastrophe. We have to look at the challenges of the last few years as an opportunity and as a way to re-prioritize what is important.

What has happened with most people these last few years is they are focused; no they are consumed, by what has been taken away and not focused on being thankful for what they have and the opportunities of tomorrow. Step back for a moment – the reason things get taken away, the reason life throws us challenges and crisis is because it is the only way we will wake up and quit overlooking those things which are really most important in life – our F5 (Faith, Family, Friends, Fitness and Finance). Challenge and crisis gets thrown at us because it is the only thing that will slap us in the face hard enough to get our attention. Think back in your life to a time of crisis – yes you may have lost something or someone. There may have been a scare in your life of some kind, and with that crisis a door opened. A new person appeared when you looked in the mirror, usually a better person, a more thankful person, a more humble person, a more caring person, and a person with better priorities.

In every crisis and in every challenge there is an opportunity. We just have to find it. But, until we let go of the pain and anger of what we have lost, and focus on all that we have which is really most important, the agony will not stop. And, once we do focus on what we have, life will be even better than it was before. This week and beyond, make a commitment EVERYDAY to give thanks and be grateful for everything and everyone you have in your life. Quit being consumed by what you have lost, or the pain will not stop and you will not be able to move forward towards accomplishing greatness. If you can do this, not only will the pain stop, but life will be better and you will be more at peace than ever before.

Remember, life is about who we become and how we grow when faced with challenge, with crisis, and with pain. It is what life is all about. It is why we are here. So step back and look in the mirror, who are you becoming?

This week is Thanksgiving – be thankful and be grateful for all we have in our lives. The rest is just “stuff.”

Morning Mojo: My life is in a rut!!!!

By Tom Tognoli | November 7th, 2011 0 Comments

“I’m stuck in a rut…I’m just not happy with where I am in my life.”

We can feel this way about our health, our relationships, and our job. We can feel like we are stuck in a rut, good or bad, about anything in life.

So, how do we get out of the bad ruts?

The bad news is it takes a lot of work to get out of them. The good news is when we are in good ruts it’s also hard to get out of them. I call them the ruts of life.

Look at all the equities of your life – your F5 (Faith, Family, Friends, Fitness and Finance). What kind of ruts are you stuck in – good or bad? Often our ruts can include being happy or sad, inspired or uninspired, purpose driven or purposeless, healthy or unhealthy, motivated or unmotivated, in good relationships or bad relationships. I think anyone who answers how are you with “I’m okay” or ”I’m fine” is in a bad rut and in denial. They just don’t know it and/or don’t want to admit it.

In life we can’t live between the ruts, it’s just too hard, it’s like trying to balance on a tight rope for our entire life – eventually we get tired and fall to one side. Unfortunately if we don’t make a conscious decision typically we’ll fall into a bad rut. So, we have to accept the fact we are going to get stuck in one of the two ruts – good or bad. In the book The Purpose Driven Life it says, “Nothing shapes your life more than the commitments you choose to make. Your commitments can develop you or they can destroy you, but either way they will define you.”

Let’s make the commitment today to scrape and claw our way out of the bad ruts. Once we’re out, just roll over and fall into the good rut. There will be short-term pain with getting out, but it will pass and then you will experience the long-term gain of living life in the good ruts.

Get stuck in the good ruts and make it a GREAT week!!!!

Morning Mojo: Everything expands to meet the resources available

By Tom Tognoli | October 31st, 2011 0 Comments

MONEY…WORK…HEALTH…YOUR WEIGHT…LIFE – everything expands to meet the resources available. Have you ever noticed how that works?

It’s the day before you go on vacation. How is it you can get all that stuff done you haven’t been able to get done for months, the day before you leave on vacation? Because we have a deadline.
It’s April 15th and you get your taxes done just in time. How is it we can get our taxes done and dropped off at the Post Office the evening of April 15th, but could never seem to find the time the three and a half months before. Because we have a deadline.
You ever notice when you go on a diet and lose all that weight you can’t seem to keep it off. Next time try burning all of your old clothes so you can’t expand back into them. Because if you have clothes that will fit when you put back on the weight, guess what? You will. Remove the option or at least make it expensive if you do.
Have you ever noticed that no matter how much money you make it never seems to be enough? It’s because your expenses are expanding to meet your income. Watch out for this one…it is a killer!!!
Why is it at the end of a football game with only 2 minutes left a team can score, but they had not been able to score the entire game before the final 2 minutes? The deadline is 2 minutes away and either they win or lose…they have no options.

When we have deadlines we are forced into action – no more procrastination – you just do it because you have to. Somehow we need to figure out a way to create our own self imposed deadlines, get ahead in the game early and not wait until the last 2 minutes.

Isn’t it funny, that no matter where we are in life, we always feel like we don’t have enough time? In high school…in college…starting our career…after we get married…after we have kids. Not only can we seem to get more and more done at each stage in life, but when we reflect back, we wonder what we did with all that free time we had in the previous stage of our life. It’s just because the amount of time it takes to do things will expand or reduce to meet the amount of time you give it.

Operate from a schedule and create mini deadlines on everything and then let someone you know, who will hold you to it, about the deadline. It is called accountability – that other word we all hate. For most it is almost like the word death. But the reality of it is, if you want to have freedom and success you need to have accountability and discipline. Sorry about that.

Make it a GREAT week!

Morning Mojo: Keep Your Cool

By Tom Tognoli | October 24th, 2011 0 Comments

No response. Complaints. Bad attitude. Someone or something gets you mad or upset. They break their promise, they don’t do their job, they drop the ball, they say something offensive or confrontational, or they challenge you. You feel attacked and disrespected. The natural instinct is to strike back…to fight. You rant, rave and yell about that person to anyone willing to listen. You put up the cold shoulder and some attitude. “Who the hell do they think they are anyway…I am going to teach them…”

Does this sound familiar? It is the way most people deal with conflict. I am here to tell you that flying off the handle does not make any situation better. It only makes things worse. The only one you end up hurting when you let your emotions get the better of you is…you.

I am not saying that you should ignore issues and conflict. I am saying that you should evaluate the way you are going to address issues and conflict, before you address them. Those of you who know me have probably never seen me mad, upset or lose my cool…at least not on the outside. It’s not that I don’t have bad days and sometimes things don’t go my way. It is not that I don’t get frustrated or rattled. I do. I have simply made the conscious decision to deal with life and conflict in a calm, controlled and calculated manner. I have discovered that people who remain in control and keep their emotions in check, when everyone and everything around them is out of control, typically come out ahead. They don’t waste their energy on other people’s drama. The interesting thing is, a calm response to the conflict will eventually calm the other person, so you can move on to a constructive conversation because you did not fuel the fire.

I know it is not easy, but my challenge to you is to not get sucked into other people’s drama. Keep calm, cool and collected. Do this and I promise you will not only win the battles, but you will win the war of life and business.

Chill!